The Palermo Sisters and the Olympians: The Snow Thief (Part I)

Day One: Team Palermo set out for the Jewel of the Pacific Northwest, Vancouver, British Columbia. In preparation for this trip, we had taken a side trip last October to Detroit in order to obtain some travel documents that would facilitate our border crossing. Our schedule wouldn’t permit pat downs for fun and enjoyment this time around. This was to be wall to wall business. But Team Palermo was short the third member, Skeezy, due to an incident under continuing investigations. Apparently, a pod of whales disguised as a rainstorm had spouted water over southern California rendering all her official Olympic tickets unusable. At least this was what was reported to Sleezy and Sneezy. This was the second time those whales had infiltrated our defenses. Last month’s training mission to Salt Lake City was also done at less than a full strength Palermo Team. We had to be bailed out by local operatives, Stalky (Myrtle) and Stridey (Nora). If the whales continue disrupting our missions, we may need provide Skeezy with protection or interview a new permanent Palermo.

Fortunately, we have a Palermo undercover operative stationed there, Agent Sssshhh-hockey is on the TV Palermo. Code named Shockey, she transmitted our rendezvous point through a series of complicated directions designed to throw off any official tracking methods. The detour via Calgary really shook our tails and confused anyone following us.

Shockey’s lair is cleverly designed and decorated in a manner that would lead ordinary observers to think an average Canadian resided there. All the tell tale signs were there: a cask of maple syrup in a corner, plaid covered furniture, hand carved moose and bear bookends holding books likes like, “On the Button: The Definitive Guide to Curling Tactics”, “ The Conversational Canadian, Eh?” and “Etiquette for all Non-Syrup Related Situations”. Then the pièce de résistance, two signed posters of Wayne Gretsky and Sidney Crosby with a prayer candle always lit. There did appear to be lipstick stains on the Crosby, all in good taste I can assure you. None of her neighbors think anything suspicious is a puck.

Shockey then gave us a lay of the land tour; we mean, she showed us around Richmond which hosted the O Zone and the speed skating oval. We enjoyed a companionable dinner trading stories and plotting strategies. We had been assigned a list of items to acquire and transport back undercover of darkness to Palermo, Inc. headquarters. Seemingly innocuous things like postcards, sweaters, pins and T-Shirts were the perfect touristy mementos that often go ignored by The Man. The Detroit documents had sped us through with out delay. Sneezy’s brilliant pre-planning was paying dividends as we headed back to headquarters through a balmy, clear night.