After our tour returned us back the ship, Sneezy, Skeezy and Sleezy head back into Messina for a little action. It is after all a port filled with stevedores and sailors. Sleenky, still appalled by Sleezy’s “Associates”, chose to seek sanctuary in the safety of the nearest church, not trusting assurances that the hot tub of holy water onboard was as equally effective. Regrettably, a two-hour walk around the waterfront netted only catcalls and whistles. But after duct-taping Sneezy into silence, our search for dependable high speed internet resumes. But apparently the preferred method for communication is still carrier pigeon. We all agreed that one trip to Sicily is enough for a lifetime.
With the body now off-ship, Mr. Steele’s thoughts returned to amore. He dressed in his finest tuxedo
and swept Laura out for a birthday celebration toast at Scott’s Piano Bar. Just as things got tantalizingly close to a romantic breakthrough, a horrible Mildred-like interruption occurred when four foa beathered broads entered the bar demanding ABBA tunes. Sam, the piano-playing, hockey-hating Canadian, was not amused at the disruption of his quiet set of romantic ballads, and decided to quicken the pace. He asked if anyone knew anything fast. Sleezy responded in the blink of an eye, “Skeeziks!”. In a margarita-induced haze, Skeezy jumped up on the piano 
while Sam played “Dancing Queen” and her three hand maidens danced enticingly for any patron on deck four. Steele reminded Laura of her promise to show him her fan dance from Pepe’s when Sam transitioned to “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun”. Laura purloined a boa from one of the hand maidens and was just about to demonstrate how to have some real fun when the sniper paparazzi arrived. The crowd scattered back to their various staterooms.
Happy Birthday Stephanie! We hope you had as much fun today as we did with “Steph-on-a-Stick”. By the way, we celebrated in international waters so any attempt to have us arrested or bring civil action are without legal merit. At least that’s what Enzo and Felix Murietta’s cousin claims.
